Mirror Images

Yesterday was a very hectic day. So much of work that even if we would stayed the night in office it wouldn't have got finished. Suddenly i had to rush to Gurgaon, that too without eating anything. So obviously i wasn't feeling great, thanks to the hunger pangs. And it was so damn hot. To distract myself I started reading the book i was carrying (Puppet on a chain by Alistair Maclean). Couldn't have picked a better book, on a better day & in a better place. On my way towards the IFFCO chowk as i had the central mall on my right, i couldn't continue with the reading. I once again realised that this book i was reading wasn't mine. And when i had picked it, i had the intentions of returning it to the friend i had borrowed it from. Now its different. And i once again started cursing myself for this habit of relating things, people, places etc. etc.

After i recovered from my workload shock after my meeting, once again i started connecting the dots around me. It was time to call the person who has taught me in the last few months as to how to treat things as just things. Suvidha, my best friend & my mirror image. We are so similar that's its freaking. And the moment i called her & said "hi" she knew im not doing too well. and she just asked "Wat's up"? All i had to say was "I'm in gurgaon." Although i go to Gurgaon every other day but Suvidha knew what I really meant this time. She just knew I was not fine. And that's something she can never tolerate. And the moment she realised I am outside Central, MGF etc. she knew where i was headed to. And where this conversation is headed to. While talking to her I started missing the third member of our group, Geetanjali. She & I had so much fun in Metropoplitan sometime back. And I couldn't help but have a big smile. And i realised how easily our brain connects places & objects to people. And how easily it moves on. Like mine moved on from Central to MGF. And also how everything changes once you take a U-turn & come on the other side of the road.

But still i was pissed with this habit of mine which makes me connect everything to something or the other, someone or the other. Suvidha, instead felt that its a very nice thing. And what she said made me feel happy, proud & less apologetic about this habit. She was like " I am glad that you are still so sensitive to everything, that too towards small small things around you. At least you are not cold, you still feel bad and good about so many things. I would have been worried if you wouldn't have been feeling like this. Because that's not you, that was not you, and you are still you! And the best is that its not out of sight out of mind for you." After listening to her, i thought yes probably its a good thing. What is the harm in being sensitive to things, places & people. I have always been like this. And why should I feel bad about habits which make me what i am. But i certainly could have done without the last part of her sentence. But once again in life i felt so blessed to have her in my life. Once more Suvidha turned everything around. By the time I reached Nehru Place, both of us were giggling like crazy girls. But that's how we are. We are mirror images.

Although we have been best friends since a very long time but post September, after she got married, our friendship has matured all the more. Although I think that we have lost it all the more with each passing day!!! In the last six months or so, i have always looked up to her for support, advice, love, care & affection. She is one person who is so intuitive. I never have to tell her what will make me happy. She just knows it. That's why i probably initially don't tell her what i really want. One, I can't hide anything from her & two if she knows that something makes me happy, she will also want the same thing for me. And for both of us, either we get what we want or we don't want it at all. When we know that we deserve the bar of chocolate, why the hell will we settle for for Eclairs. Right Suvidha? Lot of people may call this being adamant. We call it "clarity". Of what we want & what we don't. We might not always get what we want, but we certainly don't settle for something we don't want. Good or bad but Suvidha & I just don't treat anything in life "casually". Having said that, Suvidha is one person who actually teaches me how to "chill"!!Lot of times she tells me, to just give myself a break. In between all the stupidities we do, Suvidha has taught me so much about life. That too while giggling!!!!!

And must say I have been a good student. This I realised when the other day while yapping on the phone, she asked to go switch on the TV & watch "how i met your mother". I said "no I don't want to watch it". She was like "Kamna its just a show!". And all i replied was "Exactly its just a show, a show I am not a regular viewer of. Why should I leave everything I am doing to watch it when I am not really in the mood to watch TV. And what i really want to do is to talk to my best friend, that exactly what I am doing." And although, i could not see her, but i knew she smiled at my reply. I am sure she must have felt proud that finally I did learn which she taught me. How to treat things as things. Just things. By watching it then, trying to prove a point, i would have actually defeated the whole purpose.

Thanks Suvidha, for everything you have done in all these years & more so in all these months. How you used to drag me to the farm thinking it will lift my mood, and trust me it really did. How you used to be beside me to stop me from going into my handy-shell. And more than anything else how once you told me that the ever-optimistic Kamna is becoming a pessimist. She has started looking at the galss as half-empty. The made me feel scared. Scared of no-longer remaining your mirror image. The best compliment i have ever got in my life is from you, when you said that "Kamna we are mirror images". If am YOUR mirror image, then I have to be amazing! And Awesome too!!! ;)